People Who Love

All week a thought has engulfed my mind like a thick cloud of darkness; a heavy weight has consumed my heart and caused me to be downcast. It hurts so much to share these words but I know it's time to discuss the pent up thoughts I've been carrying for years. At my lowest point, trying desperately to survive as a single parent, I initially had the support of people in church but as the years wore on this vanished. Exhaustion consumed me and litigation became a constant stress that dug its ugly tentacles into the very fabric of our life. Some days I didn't think we'd make it to the end of the week. When I was kneeling down unable to handle the stress of life, people from church trampled on me with their judgement and nonacceptance just like I was a doormat. When they asked how I was often they didn't want to hear so I pretended I was fine which couldn't have been further from the truth. We were hanging on by a thread. Years of going it alone continued but the pain of church and the heartache of feeling like I was isolated, unappreciated and the black sheep of the folds wore away at me, sucking the joy right out of my life. The pain I faced was huge. To survive, our life continued to be a day by day process. My mom was the main person that kept us sane during these trying and difficult years. A few others stepped in from time to time to help but by and large it was my mom and the support of God that sustained us. The acceptance I so desperately longed for in church was mostly nonexistent. I went only because my children wanted to go not because I did. Entering the doors of the church was the thing I dreaded each and every week of my life for years. Often I would cry when I left church at the end of the service. Year after year, day after day with a few exceptions this was the road I traveled down until one day I opened the doors to a non-denominational church. When I walked through that door it was like I entered heaven. For the first time I was accepted, loved, appreciated, listened to and people met me where I was on my journey in life. They taught me what true Christianity is and they loved, nurtured and accepted us.

I Corinthians 13 says, "If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails . . . And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."

Love is the most important thing any of us can give to the world. There is so much hurt, judgement and suffering in life. It's time for us to love all individuals God places in our lives. May we love them as Christ first loved us. Listen, encourage, send cards, purchase groceries, bring meals, or take them out to eat, in these small ways we are sharing love. These simple things will bring hope and encouragement to someone hanging on by a thread. May we be people who love.